When the Sun Fell Down
by Raine Ito
Summary: Seifer's on the run from the families of the people he's killed. But just when he starts to pull it together, can he escape from the punishment he's wraught on himself?
1. The Sky and the Sea

As her head exploded up through the surface of the water, Fujin Kazeno closed her one eye against the heavy mid-day sunlight that beat down all around her, glistening off the water that encircled her, and baking the soft sandy beach nearby. It gave her wet silver hair a sparkling quality as she tread there, out several feet into the ocean, enjoying a few moments alone, away for only a short while from the constant fearful and frantic beat of life that she was now so used to. She wished to great Hyne that she could stay here forever, with the waves gently pushing her body back and forth, ripples spreading around her with a calm and tranquil slowness that she'd come to know as paradise. But she knew that couldn't be, as she was already promised to the man who it all revolved around, and tomorrow she knew she would be gone again, some other place, probably not as beautiful. It was likely that she would be staying in someone's back alley or dirty attic, or maybe stowing away on a ship to get to some other secluded island, just to leave again the next week yet again. 

The sunlight began to burn the place where her broken eye had once been, the use of which had been taken away by a well-placed gunshot all those years ago. The man who'd shot it had been a friend of hers, up until the night when he'd gotten very drunk at a bar, and had come back to Garden, and had suddenly viewed Fujin as a conquest for his manliness. While fighting his efforts to rape her, Fujin had provoked him to finally shoot her down to the ground, taking out her eye and a part of her pride that she'd never be able to regain. He'd had her then, as hard as she struggled and screamed, and that had been the end of the life-loving Fujin she'd used to be. She'd started using one-word phrases, no longer willing to really speak to people. She'd started believing that there was no love, no real purpose to life at all, and had then fallen in with Raijin and Seifer, and had been changed yet again. She'd learned to believe in Seifer, and his pride and confidence, and had learned to trust and care about him over time. Now he was on the run from the relatives of all the people he'd helped kill while fighting as Ultimecia's knight, and she and Raijin, who'd sold their souls to him by then, were along with him wherever he went.

She'd been so sure that they'd be able to be safe at Balamb, they all had, really. But when they'd arrived at the Garden gates, Squall had come out to meet them, had looked at them for a moment, then just turned away and left them there, standing in the pouring rain, and made sure to lock the gates securely behind him. That had been yet another blow to Fujin's heart in the scheme of things. Turned away from the place they'd grown up, from the people they'd fought with for so long, the people they'd cared about, and whom they'd used to joke around with, train with, and even the people they'd loved. Of course, Fujin knew full well why they were no longer accepted. Seifer had been the one who killed their families and friends, and they were not for a moment going to let him back into their lives. And loyal Raijin and Fujin were simply taken as part of Seifer, and treated the same.

A brief pang of bitterness engulfed Fujin at how she'd thrown her life so willingly into Seifer's hands, and how he'd accepted it, what he'd done with their friendship, their trust, their loyalty, and how he'd thrown all three of them into complete darkness. For the first time in her life, she doubted Seifer, almost hated him…but couldn't, and it all faded into gray. She couldn't hate Seifer, because they were all in the same boat now, and they had to face it all together…or they really would be nowhere, without anything, without even the knowledge that if one of them died, someone would pray for them. Because Fujin knew now that it really did matter whether or not you had someone to hold on to…and Seifer and Raijin were all she had left. She couldn't desert them, not even if she desperately wanted to, because she needed them, needed someone to talk to, needed someone to be able to turn to when it all fell apart, and say, "Help me." And though she'd never ever admit it to anyone, Fujin was so scared sometimes that she'd wake up someday and they wouldn't be there anymore.

She shook the water out of her hair as she climbed up onto the beach and dried herself off with a borrowed towel, dressing quickly but leaving her feet bare to walk through the foaming surf, and feel the water tickling her toes, and try to remember what it was like before all this had happened, before Ultimecia, before exile, before everything. She tried to remember what it was like when she'd been happy…and couldn't. And it scared her more than anything else in the world. Quickly grabbing her shoes, she rushed up to the small shack where they were presently staying, trying to get these thoughts out of her mind.

************

When she entered the house, it was obvious that Raijin was making dinner, by the horrendous smell of badly cooked fish wafting through the house. She wrinkled her nose in disgust, holding her breath as she walked through to the kitchen, and ran straight into Raijin, who seemed to be heading out of the house. "Oh, good, was just about to go looking for ya, Fuu, ya know? Dinner's ready!" She swallowed convulsively. "SMELL," she reprimanded, giving him an I'm-not-eating-that look. "NOT GOOD." Raijin scratched the back of his neck. "Aw, c'mon, it'll be better than last night, I promise. That was just a little mistake, ya know?I really am a better cook than that, ya know?" Fujin shook her head sternly, thinking of the night before's appalling over cooked fish, marinated in some suspicious yellow sauce. "NO MISTAKES," she admonished, brushing past him into the kitchen, and observing the fish simmering on the stove. "I don't want to get sick," she said, dropping her usual one word phrases. "Seriously, Raijin, what is this stuff? It's disgusting."

"Ah, well, I bought it off this guy in Balamb, ya know? I-!" But before he could finish his sentence, the door burst open, and Seifer stumbled in, breathing hard. "Fuu, Raijin, we gotta get out of here now. They know we're here! Some Balamb fish seller ratted us out. Don't know how he figure out we were here, but we have to go, now! Quick, grab your stuff…and what is that nasty smell? Raijin, you cooking again? Ich." Fujin and Raijin exchanged a look, and Raijin sheepishly backed out of the room, and quickly up the stairs to gather his belongings. Fujin sighed, and shook her head, giving Seifer a long look before turning to follow him. "Hey, Fuu-sama, what's up?" He asked, stopping her with a hand on her shoulder. He gently spun her towards him, opening his mouth to say something, but she broke away and hurried up the stairs, not looking at him. Seifer stood, watching her go, a confused and hurt look on his face as she disappeared into the upstairs room.


	2. Falls Apart

They left in the middle of the night, hoping to be able see by moonlight. Yet the moon was dim and there was only a sliver of it visible in the sky. There were no stars out either, and the night was very dark, almost pitch black, except for some very faintly visible Balamb city lights, back the way they had come. They stumbled around in the dark, bumping into each other, sometimes tripping and falling to the sandy ground, or into the surf, getting soaked and gritty and tired and cold, and eventually, when Raijin fell into a heap on the ground, and didn't get up again, panting and wheezing, they all sat down and joined him, breathing hard and staring off behind them, terrified that any minute they would hear the sound of feet running, someone coming, or even see an approaching light in the distance. Everyone was jumpy and on edge, and Seifer himself felt awful, because he knew none of this would have happened if it were not for him being who he was. No one spoke for a very long time, until Fujin finally spoke up. "HUNGRY," she proclaimed, and Raijin nodded, eying the pack of food they'd brought with them. Seifer nodded, and opened it up; taking out a few fish sandwiches and some bottled water he'd obtained in Balamb. They fish didn't smell nearly as bad, he thought, stuffing it into his mouth, as he'd thought it had. Maybe it was just because he was so hungry.

He heard the sounds of crunching and chomping from one side of him, and assumed that Raijin must be on that side. Therefore the other side must be Fujin, he thought, and tried to see her through the darkness, but couldn't. So he reached out a hand, groping around until he found hers, resting on the ground near an empty bottle, and he placed his own on it. "You cold, Fuu-sama?" She said nothing for a moment, and then he felt her hand tense in his. He couldn't understand it. Why did she keep avoiding him? Maybe she was just tired, he thought, hoping to Hyne that it was true. He couldn't understand why it mattered so much, compared to all his other problems, but he hated so much when she drew away from him like that. Hadn't they been friends for most of their lives? Was she scared of him, he wondered, suddenly realizing, maybe scared that he'd do to her what that stupid SeeD had done to her? That he'd turn on her like that? He squeezed her hand tighter, not realizing that he was doing it, and vowed that he'd tell her in the morning that he'd never ever hurt her that way. He never wanted to hurt her or Raijin again; he'd already done enough to ruin their lives. He'd taken them away from their safety, their friends, and dragged them on his stupid crusade. Now they were all lost, and they had each other, and he needed them, and hated himself.

Then suddenly he felt the answering pressure from Fujin's hand, and felt it shivering beneath his. He removed his coat, and threw it over her shoulders, ignoring the cold that now crept in all around him, satisfied when she stopped shaking. "Thank You," she whispered, and he bit his lip. "Try to get some sleep, Fuu," he said, reluctantly letting go of her hand, feeling the strange comfort it gave him just to know that she was there next to him. He looked over at Raijin and saw him collapsed on the ground, already asleep. Shaking his head in bewilderment, he hunkered down on the sand and tried to close his own eyes and drift off. But he couldn't, and wouldn't fall asleep until he heard the gentle rise and fall of Fujin's breath next to him, and knew that she was also asleep. Then he felt safe to sleep himself. Yet he still could not.

Standing up and quietly walking a few paces away from his sleeping companions, he found a rock to seat himself on, and watched the only visible star in the sky for a long time, until everything else around him became a hazy, drowsy blur. He knew he had to get his rest, but couldn't help thinking about getting up and leaving without Raijin and Fujin. He knew that if they were found, they wouldn't be blamed for all the things he'd done. They'd tried to turn him, had gone with him, but had never truly helped him in his horrible schemes. They'd be able to find somewhere to go, and would be able to lead their lives happily without him. He didn't want to drag them into this any more than they already were, didn't want to endanger their lives for his own sake. He knew he could get up right now and just leave, and in the morning they would wake up and he'd be gone, and they wouldn't know where. Eventually, he hoped, they'd give up looking and go off on their own. 

But he knew also that he couldn't do that…because he needed them. He'd only been able to salvage what was left of his life after Ultimecia, because they had come along to help him. He'd tried to kill himself, after Ultimecia had been defeated, and he'd been snapped back to his senses, and Raijin had found him, had held him down while Fujin wrenched the gunblade out of his grasp. They'd sat there and talked to him for hours, while he struggled and moaned and tried to reach the weapon that would end all of their torment. But after a while, he'd decided it was better to live, and had been talked into letting Raijin and Fujin come with him as he ran away from the world that wanted his head on a silver platter. But early on he'd begun having second thoughts, and had tried so hard to persuade Fujin and Raijin to leave him. But they wouldn't. They'd even seen through his attempts to shake him when he pretended to have gone back to his old ways. They'd known all through that that he was lying, and he'd given up. There was nothing he could do. 

He couldn't go on with out them, he knew, and he knew that if he left them here, that would be the end of him. He'd either end his own life after all, or be caught eventually, maybe even of his own will, because he wouldn't have anything to live for. And really, he didn't want to die, he just wanted to live a different life, somewhere where they could all be happy, and wouldn't have to worry about any of it anymore. He sat on the rock and hung his head and held back the tears that threatened to spill forth. But Seifer Almasy didn't cry…and he had to go on tomorrow.


	3. Run Away

When they awoke the next morning, nobody bothered speaking as they gathered up the rest of the uneaten fish sandwiches, packed up, and set off on their way. They knew there was a harbor on the other side of the island, and hoped to get there before the end of the day, to try to catch a ride on any ships that were heading out. As usual, it didn't matter where the ship was going, as long as they got there without being found. But it would be a very long walk to get there, and they were already tired from running halfway, because Raijin had been sure he'd seen some Esthar soldiers snooping around in a forest they'd trudged through, and Seifer didn't want to take any chances. But when they'd become too weary to run, they'd slowed down, and now they were exhausted. They didn't know how long they'd been traveling, but it didn't really matter. All Fujin could think about was how nice it would be when they finally got to sit down. Even the gritty sand and hard ground they'd slept on last night seemed inviting compared to this constant moving. 

Just when they felt they couldn't walk any more, and were ready to drop down right in the middle of the ground and sleep, they heard a vague rumbling sound in the distance. Seifer's eyes widened in horror. "GET DOWN," he roared, jumping behind a nearby rock. Fujin and Raijin clambered over and ducked down just in time, staring forward and preparing themselves for the rush of Esthar soldiers that were sure had finally caught up with them, or maybe had been behind them the whole time without them noticing. But instead of soldiers, a blur of yellow sped by, and then another, and another, and another, seeming without end. "CHOCOBO," said Fujin in surprise, releasing her death-hold on Seifer's arm, and standing up behind the rock. She watched the seemingly thousands of chocobos run by, fascinated despite herself at how fast and agile they really were. "Yeah," said Seifer slowly, a smile spreading across his face. He opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Raijin leapt forward, grappling one of the chocobos around the neck. 

At first shocked at his move, Fujin suddenly burst out laughing when she watched Raijin, attempting to mount the chocobo, get dragged along behind it as it careened around and tried to buck him off. She and Seifer ran forward, still laughing in both relief that it was only chocobos when she'd thought it was soldiers, and at Raijin's pathetic attempts at getting on the chocobo. She grabbed one of the other chocobos that were speeding by, and managed to throw on leg over its back and hoist herself up. She steered it alongside Raijin's, and pulled him up onto his own chocobo, before looking over her shoulder, and saw Seifer behind them on his. She had to admit; it looked a little strange, strong, handsome Seifer, his golden hair waving around him in the wind as he rode, with a bright beaming smile on his face, riding an awkward yellow bird, but she found herself staring at him, at the way his eyes gleamed as he smiled, at the way his long coat billowed around him, at his profile as he pulled alongside her. She shook herself, wondering what had come over her. She'd never really noticed these little things before.

They rode along, all three of them side by side, in a much better mood, laughing and joking. Fujin loved the wind in her hair, and the feeling of it against her face as she rode. They'd get to the harbor now, no problem, and would undoubtedly find some ship that they could go on, to some new place, some new possibilities. Why had she ever doubted, she wondered, when the harbor loomed into view an hour or so later, that Seifer would get them here? 

****************

When they got there, they found out that the next ship was a cargo ship, leaving for Trabia, but not for a good two hours yet. So excited and happy from the unexpectedly fun ride here, they didn't bother hiding themselves, like usual, but walked around freely, not really caring if anyone recognized them, as they'd be gone from here soon enough. So they entered the junk shop without disguises or trickery, and walked up to the counter. There were some samples hanging around on the walls, and Fujin picked up the upgrade to her present weapon. They all knew they didn't have the money to buy it. They had almost no gil at all, but as Fujin stood there, her red eyes flashing as she twirled it in her hands, Seifer couldn't help realizing how beautiful she was. He noticed the grace with which she handled the weapon, and wished to Hyne that he could buy it for her, that somehow they could obtain it, just to see her face light up with one of it's rare smiles.

_I love her_, he realized, and the thought hit him like an accurately thrown brick. _I love her_, _and I'm dragging her all over the world because I'm too afraid to pay for my sins. What is she doing here, with me? She's so goddamn beautiful and perfect and wonderful and I only now just noticed it, and it's too late for her to get away from me before I destroy her life! _Not realizing that Fujin and Raijin were staring at him, he ran his fist into the wall, and the shopkeeper raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth to speak. But before he could kick Seifer out, Seifer walked out himself, and then started running once he reached the exit, hearing Fujin and Raijin's footsteps on his heels. _Dammit, _he thought, _don't follow me! Go and lead your own lives, get away from me before I kill you! Can't you see it, you stupid girl? When they catch me, you'll both die too! You're too beautiful to die…_

_ _

__"SEIFER!" Fujin had finally come alongside him, and grabbed his sleeve. "STOP!" Raijin came running up, puffing out his breaths in exhaustion. "What's the hurry? Nothing to run away from, ya know?" Seifer shook his head in internal agony. _If_ _only you realized,_ he thought. _You should be running away from me…get out while you still can…why can't you hate me for what I've done to you?_ But they stood and stared at him in concern, and with both their gazes locked on his, he hung his head and sunk to the ground, finally letting the tears spill forth. _Go away…run away…_


End file.
